Posted By Juliet Linderman

Hey there all you Dick lovers and disciples, and welcome to this week’s Dick Watching, bringing you all the latest whale-related news from across the internet. All aboard!

1. Our first item of the not-cool-dude news variety comes all the way from Nantucket, where this guy, who owns an antiques shop, is being hit with charges of illegally importing and selling sperm whale teeth and narwal tusks. Allegedly, this guy had no idea what he was doing was super illegal, and now he’s facing up to 20 years in prison and a $250,000 fine.  He’s not happy:
“It’s ruined my life,” Place said. “I’ve gained probably 60 pounds and I’m heavy to begin with. It has ruined my life.” So, the moral of the story is this:” if some shady dude in California tries to sell you a narwal tusk, just say no thank you.

2. Really far away from Nantucket, scientists are trying to find a suitable whale shark to tag in the first-ever “wild whale shark tagging program.” Scientists are trying to tag these big guys with satellite tracking devices that will help them better understand whale sharks’ whereabouts.

3. This is dumb: Jake Gyllenhall is planning to spend his 30th birthday in the arctic, diving with walruses. I have no idea why anyone would do this, especially Jake Gyllenhall, or why anyone thinks this is, in fact, news. But here’s what he says about it: “The only reason I’m doing it is I wanted to do something that absolutely terrified me – killer whales and walruses and freezing cold water? That seems absolutely terrifying.” Way to face your fears, Jake.

4. Ok, here’s something I can totally get behind: Ocean Voyagers, a documentary film about humpback whales, is going to be released in 3D next year! Also, it’s narrated by Meryl Streep!

5. If any of you Dick Watchers out there happen to be in Toronto you should totally go see this exhibit that just opened called Whales/Tohora at the Ontario Science Center. This shit looks amazing: It’s got a life-sized reproduction of a crawl-through model of a blue whale heart, and a make-your-own-virtual-whale station. I ask you: Who wouldn’t wanna? Parts of the exhibition, which also features some awesome and super rare whale skeletons, is borrowed from Museum of New Zealand Te Papa Tongarewa’s whale collection. “The exhibit preview opened with a spiritual ceremony at dawn, with Maori elders blessing the exhibition as they passed it over to the care of Canadian First Nations representatives.” So cool!

Share →