A City of Jeremys
by Sagar Nair
There was a Jeremy who stole carrots from the elementary school veggie patch, and waved them around like magic wands, and poked people in the neck. There was a Jeremy who never drank water, because it made him feel like he was drowning. There was a Jeremy born with green fingernails. His coworkers trapped him in the elevator and peeled off his fingernails and served them on a cheese platter to impress the investors. There was a Jeremy who got hit by a bus. There was a Jeremy who had apples instead of eyes, and everyone spat globs on him. His brother poured apple juice on him and his laptop. When he went to the repair shop, the technician pretended to gag. “Did you know apples are disgusting?” he said. “Just letting you know.” He made him wear a trash bag over his head while he fixed the laptop.