The Punches 

Paula + Gian
The Punches: Some words on Giancarlo DiTrapano, on the 1 year anniversary of his death

Gian published me twice in his journal, affectionately known as the Tyrant. The first time I didn’t know him well, but by the second time, we were close. We stayed close until his death. I had a crush on him as we began to get to know each other, and on a cigarette break during some reading in Brooklyn —in, like 2007? — he had fucked a priest in Hell’s Kitchen — I think behind a building. I asked, how was it? He said it was great. That was how I realized we were not on the same team. We both were on team friendship and as our friendship grew, we agreed on so many writers and books — the journals of Cheever was a particular bonding moment. At the beginning of publishing the Tyrant journal, he’d publish the work of dead, unfashionable writers — F Scott Fitzgerald, Tennessee Williams.

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My Father’s Suicide and “The Days of Abandonment”

“They cut you open to get at your heart, sounds like a metaphor for something but it’s not” -Juliana Hatfield   In the The Days of Abandonment by Elena Ferrante, narrator Olga describes her reaction to her husband of nearly two decades’ abrupt decision to abandon her and their two young children. “I couldn’t calm down. Was it possible that Mario should leave me like this, without warning? It seemed to me incredible that all of a sudden he had […]

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